"Start a blog", they said.

I have a blog already. This one. I just don't use it because I can't be bothered.

"They", by the way, refers to a couple of people from work (well, mostly Alex) apparently liking the things I say on Facebook. Personally I'm not sure if that's true or just an elaborate conspiracy to get me to stop cluttering their news feeds. But I like to take people at face value.

In the name of irony, I am going to blog about why I don't blog. Well, more specifically about why the things I say on Facebook wouldn't make good blog material. I can blog just fine when I can be arsed, as I am about to demonstrate.

Put simply, I have a rather specific posting style on my Facebook statuses that does not translate well to blog form. Status messages are meant to be short and sweet, limited to a sentence or two. I prefer Facebook over Twitter because it lacks the 140-character limit, but I feel the principle of posting short anecdotes still applies. Facebook, by its very format, is clearly meant to be read by people who don't want to pay attention to any single item for more than about five to ten seconds or so.
Which is why, when I post something on Facebook about things that happen during my day, I like to be brief.
And by being brief on Facebook, I've learned to have a lot of fun "enhancing" the truth.
No, no, I don't lie. I just pick specific details to emphasise- leaving out the context and presenting only the conclusion so as to properly demonstrate just how wacky and out-there it something actually is. Pepper with a little bit of snarky sarcasm and serve.
What we're left with is something that sounds interesting, and yet leaves enough to imagination that the reader will probably invent their own far more interesting version of the truth. (Or otherwise, encourage any interested parties to ask for the rest of the story.)

Now, this posting style does not lend itself well to a blog, where I'm not constrained by any limits on how brief to make my comments. Obviously a blog is no place to summarise your life in a snappy one-liner and leave it at that (well, unless it's a Tumblr "blog"). And when it comes to my life, well, I don't like talking to a whole crowd about my day, because it's usually not all that interesting, except maybe to those already invested in my life.

Maybe that's because I all but grew up on the internet- a land where most of what you say about your "feelings" and things that happened to you lately are met with "haha, nobody cares", but I've come to understand that if I want people to care about what I say, it needs to somehow be relevant or interesting to them. Something that makes a point, gives you something to think about or in any way affects you.
Like recommending that you try a cheese and strawberry sandwich.
No, seriously, go do that.
Stop wondering whether or not I put on clothes and left the house today and make yourself a cheese and strawberry sandwich. If you don't have strawberries, jam is fine too.
Go on, try it.
I'm done here.